FAQ

1.) Q: Why is the site called An Awkward Attempt? 
A: I am an extremely awkward individual and have been since birth. If you know me in real life, chances are you have personally witnessed my painful attempts at trying to be normal and less awkward. After years of denial, I have come to accept my socially awkward existence and have chosen to embrace it. Every day I awkwardly attempt to get through the hours, laughing at myself along the way.

2.) Q: Why did you move to the Midwest?
A: Because, I didn’t really believe that it was as cold as everyone made it out to be. So, I moved here to find out for myself.

3.) Q: Well…is it cold where you live?
A: Not at all.

4.) Q: Are you lying about it being cold?
A: Totally and completely lying.

5.) Q: Are you ever going to put any legitimate questions on here?
A: As soon as I get questions/emails from all you awesome peeps. Send me an email!

6.) Q: Why don’t you post twice a week anymore?
A: Fiction writing is a lot different than blog writing. My brain is in a different state/world/focus when I’m writing fiction. Because I want to be a published author, I’m putting a lot of my brain power into the fiction side of my prose. Also, I took a crazy pill and am back in school. However, this place is still special to me and I will never abandon it completely. I try to get a few posts up a month, but my main goals will always be content and quality over quantity. Writing is my catharsis; it’s the only way I know to be normal and thus, will always need an avenue to express my medium. I do not seek to gain fame and riches from this site. I just want to make people smile.

7.) Q: Okay, if you’re not posting much, how do you stay busy?
A: Have you ever seriously, and I mean seriously,  tried to write a full-length work of fiction? What about two? What about graduate school? I have my two projects, my school work, and various conferences, group meetings, and side projects that keep me occupied plenty. Believe me, I am up and working every day of the week from 8-5, and most of the time on the weekends too. It’s my dream and I put as much energy and time into writing as I can.

8.) Q: Are we ever going to get to see the other stuff you work on?
A: I hope to show everyone some day. Right now, everything is still in it’s early stages and if someone were to see it, it’d be like I walked out in public naked. I’m not ready for that exposure yet.

 

9.) Q: What are your books called? Can I read them?
A: The first one has a tentative title of THE WITNESS. The second one has no title yet as it’s not finished. A few people close to me have read THE WITNESS, but I’m working to try and get it published. So yeah, hopefully one day you can drive to your nearest book store (or download it on your e-reader) and obtain a copy. That’s the goal, anyway.

10.) Q: What are your books about?
A: THE WITNESS is about a group of twenty-something young adults fighting to survive in the wilderness of South Carolina after America is overrun by a once underground terrorist society. It’s an upmarket thriller that has historical undertones. The second book is too early in it’s life for me to talk about fairly because it can (and usually does) change. Once it’s done I’ll let you know, though. Promise 🙂

11.) Q: Are you really as awkward as you say you are?
A: Let me put it to you this way: recently, my sister was watching me attempt to microwave a cup of water. Easy task, right? Only 30 seconds into the matter, she laughed at me and claimed I needed a reality show. You be the judge.

12.) Q: How come you aren’t published yet?
A: How come males of all species have nipples? These are questions we can’t know the answers to.

13.) Q: Do you like sports?
A: I have an obsession with sports that my husband might divorce me over. Same can be said for him about tractors. We’re a match made in heaven. (In truth, the verdict is still out on this.)

14.) Q: What’s up with the “S.S. Dees” and “S.A. Dees” at the end of your posts? 
A: If there’s one thing that gets my panties in a twist, it’s government agencies that fuck up the simplest tasks. When I finally printed out the application to have my name legally changed from Stevenson to Dees (3 years after marriage), I asked that my maiden name be my new middle name so it would read Shirley Stevenson Dees. I had always thought S.S. Dees was a pen name that screamed “this bitch is legit.” But when I got my fancy new Social Security card in the mail, it didn’t happen the way I wanted it to. However, instead of wallowing in pity, I’ve since refused to correct this on all of my posts as a giant middle finger to the establishment.

15.) Q: Are you ever going to move back to Texas?!?!?
A: I can’t answer that because I have no idea. Let’s just pretend the real answer is yes.